Phyllis ‘Mary’ Davies has lived a life full of love and community spirit. From her early years in South Wales to her days as a national jive champion with her husband Terry, Mary’s story is one of resilience and warmth. Her devotion to caring for others defined her career, while her humour and nurturing nature continue to touch those around her. Now a resident at Gibraltar Nursing Home, Mary’s personality and commitment to helping others remain evident as she continues to engage her passions and family.
Mary, born in October 1944 in Wainfelin, attended Pontypool Town School. At 18, she worked at the local Co-op and married Terry in 1962 at Pontypool’s registry office. The couple shared a passion for jive dancing, becoming national champions, and were devoted followers of Pontypool Rugby club, traveling national wide for matches. Mary’s love of sports extended to her school days, where won the Victor Ladorum trophy as the highest scorer across all the sports at the school.
They shared two daughters, Belinda and Caroline, born in 1963 and 1966 respectively, and they raised their family in Pontypool. When Belinda was young, they lived in a unique cottage in Pontypool Park, which was one of the few cottages there, and loved being across the park from their favourite rugby club before they moved to make room for their growing family.
Mary loved her community, and dedicated herself to caring for others, working in a care home in South Wales and for her local council as a home carer, her nurturing nature made her perfectly suited for the care sector. Mary worked caring roles for a decade and a half until she retired, all in areas close to her home to support her local community.
Her daughter Caroline said that she could remember visiting her Mum and she would have several “birds” cooking in the oven for “her ladies” – she would spend time after work cooking delicious food for the women she cared for, ready to take it to them the next day. Mary’s role as a carer went beyond her visiting hours, she took her work home with her and would go out of her way to make sure everyone she cared for felt comfortable and loved. When she was working in the care sector, Mary formed strong bonds with all the people that she supported and was affected very deeply when she was no longer caring for them.
After Terry’s passing in winter 2019, Mary moved to a care home in Ebbw Vale. Living with a Dementia, she often felt like she was back in her carer days and tried to support other residents as if she worked there. She would get quite confused and distressed that people were not reacting to her in the way that they would a staff member and that her photos weren’t displayed alongside those of the actual team.
Mary then moved to Gibraltar Nursing Home, where Caroline noticed her mum appeared more “calm and settled”. Her caring nature remains evident, as she often supports other family members in the home, encouraging them to get up, and be involved in activities.
Gibraltar’s household model of care encourages family members to continue the activities they love and to continue living life. For Mary, this involves helping others with their daily activities whenever she can, often sharing her knowledge of old currency and her love of bingo. Mary can often be found watching the nurse in the treatment room, admiring her work and will often stop and talk to anyone in the “street”, a term the home uses in place of corridors or floor, both can have an institutional feel about them. Each bedroom door is designed to resemble a front door, complete with a number and a knocker, creating a familiar and welcoming environment.
She loves holding hands, guiding team and other family members to somewhere in the home, often inviting them into her room to show off her photos of her grandchildren. Verity Walmsley, the care home’s Manager, says “Mary has a great sense of humour and loves to wind the Team up, she takes pride in how she looks, what she wears, and enjoys having her hair cut and styled short in the home’s beauty salon. Verity continues that Mary “provides such comfort to not only the team but to other family members” and remarked that “just when you think she has dosed off in a comfy chair, she’s back up and off to offer a cuddle to someone”.
Mary loves animals and especially enjoys when animals visit the care home, such as the exotic animals from Animals Interactive or Poppy the Therapy Dog. Mary and her family are still very close, and she speaks with her daughters often. Mary loves Elvis Presley and can sing the words when any of his songs are playing. Her daughters recently arranged an Elvis themed 80th birthday party in Gibraltar’s Pillars Restaurant, complete with an Elvis tribute act and a big birthday sash.
Continuation of life is encouraged throughout the Monmouth care home, family members are supported to carry on with the activities they’ve always enjoyed, within reason, ensuring life remains as fulfilling and engaging as possible.
To find out more about Gibraltar Nursing Home’s activities, please visit https://www.gibraltarnursinghome.com/activities-in-care/